Taylor Welcome Wagon

First Welcome Wagon in a new Neighborhood: Rafe and Gayl Taylor greet the neighbors. Like always, whatever happens is whatever happens. All we do is try to interpret.

Gayl: Hi Cooper! Love the hair!
Cooper: Thanks. Beth likes it. You guys moved into the new neighborhood with no trouble?



Gayl: I don’t think the guy across the street made it but we’re good. So are you going on tour soon?
Cooper: Yeah I think I am – want to come up with a name for me?
Gayl: Hmm, let's see...The Eagles already did the Hell Froze Over tour...


Camilla: Hi Coop….that’s some hot coat! Those are some hot jeans!
Cooper: uh yeah
Rafe: What’s going on here? He keeps asking me about being friends.
Beth: *watching Camilla* Well go be friendly then.


Camilla grabbing Cooper and sitting down on the grass. It’s the middle of winter.
Camilla: How’s your bank balance? As hot as your jeans?


Cooper: Bank balances are not really your area of expertise, are they Cam? When did you last check yours, around 3 AM when you hit the ATM?
Beth: *thinking about babies...why am I always thinking about babies? Maybe I ought to call and check on the one I've got since I left her with the twins.*


Camilla: *admiring Cooper* You are so hot you're burning my finger...kiss it and make it better?
Cooper: *WTF...*
Beth: *I can think of something you can do with your finger*
Rafe: *Great, I got the Cooper Stanfield Fan Club Welcome Wagon.*


Gayl: You know I don't remember the roads being this curvy. I got a little queasy on the drive over.
Rafe: You think you're pregnant again?
Cooper: Actually it's a pretty straight shot over the bridge. Are you sure you're getting enough sleep?
*Beth's and Camilla's forks freeze wondering if she is knocked up...AGAIN*


Camilla: *ignoring the whole thing about whether or not Gayl is pregnant; if it’s not Gayl, it’s going to be Beth because both of them are always pregnant* So how much money do you guys have anyway and I bet you pave your drive with gold bricks don’t you? Or the bathroom that’s all gold isn’t it all gold?
Beth: *using frozen smile. Is she ever going to stop with this?*
Gayl: *oh god that is rude*
Rafe: *picks up Autumn and leaves the room before he says something he shouldn’t say*


Rafe: *Good thing Gayl doesn’t give a damn about gold toilets, and she's looking very fine today*


Cooper: *trying to change the subject and leave the room* It’s a great house, Gayl.
Gayl: Thank you, Coop.
Cammie: Why’s everybody keep talking about the house? Isn’t the same house? How did it move anyway and did mine move?


Rafe: Why is it always you? You always show up in the Welcome Wagons. Give it a rest! You’re not the center of the damned universe.
Cooper: Sure I am. I’m the star. It’s all about me.


Cooper: Come on, Rafe. I thought we were going to try to be friends, for Beth and Gayl’s sake.
Rafe: *wondering if he ended up in the wrong neighborhood, maybe some kind of test place where the people look the same but aren't* No, that never happened. I agreed not to kick your ass. I don’t recall agreeing to be your friend.


Camilla: What’s the problem you have with Gabe? You and Rafe, you never liked Gabe. And he might have been in prison all this time and just got out or broke out and that would be a bad place for Gabe because he wouldn't like it.
Gayl: I never said anything about Gabe! Gabe was in prison?


Gayl: Camilla, are you telling me Gabe broke out of prison? They’re going to be looking for him – he hasn’t come back here, has he?
Camilla: Oh like I’d tell you or Rafe and I didn’t say he was in prison did I say that? I didn’t say that!


Cooper: It’s about Heydon, isn’t it? That’s why Cam keeps pounding on us about money?
Beth: Of course it is. Don’t pay any attention to her. I don't like the way she keeps staring at your jeans.


Camilla: *leaving the kitchen, nobody cares about Gabe but she knows something, Gabe had a baby well Gabe didn’t have the baby but there was a baby*
Cooper: *tired of dealing with Rafe and Cam and thinking he’d like to get closer to Beth*
Rafe: *wondering how Camilla walks in those shoes* uh, hey Cam. There’s a chair. Over there, in the corner. Try to avoid stepping on my daughter on the way.


Autumn: *watching Aunt Camilla walking around in really big boots*


Cooper: *getting his wife up close and comfortable, and she’s getting into it, and it’s annoying Rafe which makes it all the better* We’ll give you a call, Rafe. Gayl’s always welcome.


Camilla: *this isn’t any fun. Maybe I should get married and get a honking huge engagement ring.*
Rafe: *watching Cooper start to move in on Beth, on his couch, in his living room* Look, you two have a house now, right? Maybe you should go there.


Rafe: *grumbling* Does he do that everywhere?
Gayl: They haven’t seen each other in a while, that’s all.


Rafe: Did he take some kind of trip? I mean, look at them!
Gayl: They did have some trouble but I don’t think it was a trip. I’m not sure how long it’s been –
Rafe: It hasn’t been that long! They’re out of here, all of them, including Aunt Camilla.


Gayl: You’ll remind them about the curve before they hit the bridge?
Rafe: Sure, I’ll draw them a map, anything. I’m going to have to give them our bedroom if I let them stay much longer.


Rafe: Look Camilla, I appreciate the compliments, but you do remember you’re my Aunt. You remember that? Thanks for the welcome wagon visit. Everybody’s leaving, including you.
Camilla: Oh right…maybe I forgot that. And you’re welcome okay bye!!


Gayl: *That went well, apart from Camilla and the thing about Gabe, which was strange. I think this is going to be a good year, yes a very good year!*


Rafe steps up behind Gayl and sweeps her off her feet and into his arms.
Gayl: *laughing* I hope you are carrying me off to bed and ravaging me...
Rafe: Hell yeah I am...I've got my own brand of rock 'n' roll!


Much later...
Gayl: I think we're going to be very happy here...
Rafe: It's a new year, and it's good to be home. It's very good to be home.